


Evil Deeds, Evil Hobbits

by Aria_Breuer



Category: The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dark, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Dark Lord Frodo, Evil King Pippin Took, Evil Sam Gamgee, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2019-03-08 18:36:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13464153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aria_Breuer/pseuds/Aria_Breuer
Summary: Yes! Being king is great for Samwise Gamgee! Now he just needs to work on being evil. If only Dark Lord Frodo weren’t so mischievous and King Pippin Took so rambunctious. Is it enough for Sam to keep his reign? Being wicked has never been more complex than it is now.





	Evil Deeds, Evil Hobbits

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks go to Eldhoron and megSUPERFAN for helping me with ideas for this fanfic. :)

Sam twiddled his fingers. Finally! It was so good being king! Now he could do whatever he wanted, including getting back at Lotho for everything he did! As for that Gollum creature, Sam would deal with him promptly.

“Lotho, you are a great receiver of gifts,” Sam said, raising an eyebrow. “Which is why I have given you this special gift. Here.” He passed to Lotho some poisoned bread.

“Oh, thank you! You are too kind.” Lotho said, taking a bite out of the scrumptious bread. Sam watched with wicked delight as Lotho became severely ill, collapsed on the floor, and drew his last breath.

Sam sighed. It was good to be king. Now, he just needed that one person who could bring him hope… and maybe some hunting trophies. Ah! Here he was now, with his oily brown hair and wearing those dark robes.

“Ah! Dark Lord Frodo, what brings you here?” Sam asked, greeting his friend.

“Did you kill Lotho?” Dark Lord Frodo smirked. “Sam, m’boy, you are truly becoming a great friend. Here you go!” He ran off before Sam could catch up to him.

“Humph. What is this?” Sam opened the package, finding some rotten eggs inside. “Ew!” He dropped the eggs on the floor a bit too soon.

 _Pop!_ The eggs went off, making Sam dance until their fireworks ceased. Sam hissed. “I’ll get Mister Frodo back for this! You wait and see!”

“Ha ha ha!” Dark Lord Frodo clapped, re-emerging into the throne room with a bag of chips. “Oh Sam, what you pulled off was simple, but I’ve seen dark things. Let me assure you,” he whispered aloud, “you’re _still_ a baby.”

“I am _not_ and you—” Sam jabbed an index finger at him. “—you will _pay_ for this treachery!”

Dark Lord Frodo shrugged. “Well, they certainly don’t call you Evil Samwise Gamgee for nothing, now do they?” He chuckled wickedly. “I’ll see you around or I’ll see you soon. Is that right? Oh yes! Bye Sam!” He cackled, leaving the throne room again.

Sam huffed. He had to get back at these villains! But how could he do that? Oh, King Pippin!

.

Pippin Took sighed, relaxing on his throne. It had been too long since he enjoyed these good, evil times. All hobbits were now bowing before him. That no good Dark Lord Frodo and his miserable Evil King, Samwise Gamgee, couldn’t stop his reign now! Muahahaha!

“What is this?” Pippin opened a package, discovering a giant chicken climbing out of the box. _Nooo!_ How could a giant chicken be in the box? And it breathed fire, too! And now it was attacking him! Oh, what rotten luck!

“Curse you Samwise Gamgee!” Pippin cried, making it out of the throne room before the chicken could attack him… again.

The End.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. :)
> 
>  **References:**  
>  The Giant Chicken is inspired by the Timon and Pumbaa episode “Be More Pacific”.


End file.
